...life moves faster then the ability to document it....

Ahhh I thought college flew by, I think life in general is flying by. First, I found out that I am one of the 2010 Honoree's for the pacific Northwest chapter of the Arthritis Foundation, aka Jingle Bell Run. If you don't know what that is, look it up. :) Back to my point, you needed the background information to understand some parts of this. I found myself driving home from work the day I found out, crying than laughing than crying. I think life just came full circle for me at that moment, while I was in the car I found myself asking is this what a emotional break feels like? I was crying not out of sadness but happiness and the feeling of being so blessed. Than laughing at myself for feeling the need to cry. It was quite the mess of emotions. It was truly a sight to see. There was something else I saw today that I was baffled by..... oh well...another blog.

Pet peeve of the day: If you are talking to me on facebook, or any of these online chatting things, don't just peace out while in the middle of conversation. By far the most annoying thing. I have quite a few things I find annoying but this is most definitely one of them.


Words to get you through the day:
"I'm selfish, impatient, and insecure. I make mistakes. I am out of control and at times, hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you don't deserve me at my best." - Marilyn Monroe

...events form opinions....can opinions form events?

I haven't written on here in what feels like a long time, I have so many random thoughts going on, try and keep up :)
In that last few days I have done a lot of driving! I hate commutes! I hate drivers, I love traffic, I hate stoplights that last 3 seconds, on green of course. I hate fake promises, I love my family, they can be a bit odd but that is what I love the most about them. I love going on adventures, I hate getting lost, I love a full tank of gas with my windows down and the heat on, I hate when windows are broken. I know after reading this you probably think I am the most wish-washy of a person there is, but trust me think about each thing and you will too think the way I do.
I have spent some time with my older family, ever put yourself in their thought process? It is crazy to think about all the things that have changed over the course of their life time, the oldest one I have is almost 81 years old. They are still fascinated by the idea of digital cameras, let alone digital anything. Laptops freak them out and texting on cellphones is like performing some sort of surgery. But I must give my grandpa mad props, he is 75 and he texts me like no buddies business, after he puts his glasses on of course.
Ok, you know those really orange looking girls and even some guys, they look orange and think they look tan therefore they think they are just the cats meow?! Those types of people disgust me. Like I tan, but I tan because it makes me look like the middle eastern than I am.
That is all for now...enough computer screen for me.

..:..All that is good must come to an end.:......:. I am just not ready yet..:..

With graduation just a day away I really have started to think hard about what I am leaving and what I am going to. I spent the past 4 years here, learning all of the socially acceptable things for a college girl. Now I am going to have to learn all new things that are acceptable things for an adult woman to do. Only in College can you go out 5 nights a week and be considered normal. Only in college can you not have a boyfriend and be considered cool. In college towns you are more likely to know the people you meet at the bar, no awkward creeps, well not as many. For me I am really bummed about leaving because I am not ready to leave this world of college. All the aspect that come along with being a college student. I enjoy my bartender, I mean ask anyone he is awesome but he knows how to treat me and my girls when we come, I am not going to find that in the adult world. I am not going to find this out there because I hope to goodness I am not frequenting a bar enough to get to the bartender like we have here in college. My sisters, friends, and those who support me. It is hard to leave them because they have either taught me a lot, I have taught them a lot, or they believe in me. I am however excited to venture out and meet new people, I am so super excited to move on and not have to homework anymore. It is such a bitter-sweet time for me right now, I don't really know how to react to any of it.

My family comes tomorrow, I am so excited,I tried explaining my family to some people and all I could say was they are amazing. I mean it is true I am sooo entirely blessed to have the family I have. They are all coming, I mean my parents, siblings, grandparents, and one cousin. I mean I am the first in the family lineage to graduate college. It is something worth traveling too. I am just so excited to see what they do, how they react, I am wondering how long it will take for my mother to have water works, I wonder if my dad will shed a tear because I am his baby girl graduating or his tears of joy of not having to pay tuition anymore. I guess we shall find out...

ahhhh life comes at you fast, put on a helmet and hold on because this is a ride you can't stop.

...I wish there was more time...I like this feeling....

I got to a thinking you know when you start hanging out with a new guy all the new things happen. The greatness you feel when he texts you back, when you have the slightest physical contact you get giddy. But with all the good and awesome feelings comes those nerves. For me leaving in less than a week, I hate that I met him now. Although, I am not and was not looking for anything solid, I never, ever stop the idea of anything because you never know what could come from people you meet. Well that sounded so cheesy but is soo true. But anyways back to those uneasy feelings. When you invite them into your place of residence, what are they expecting, what do they think you are thinking. I get in trouble a lot because of how much of a flirt/nice person I am. I think I lead people on. So many things are hard to just enjoy because we women over-think things...often...Like when they put their arm around you, you think about how is your head to heavy, is their arm in a comfortable position, and it goes on on. What about when they spend the night, you wonder if they are uncomfortable, if they expect more than just a darn good cuddle session or what. There is also the moments when you are wishing for something to happen but you don't want to be "that girl" that initiates something that they didn't want, so all you can do is sit there and think over and over again, just hoping they will. I will admit when that moment finally occurs it almost is more enjoyable than if it was to just happen. Enough with the physical over-thinking moments what about the god for awful texts or phone calls. Those moments where you also don't want to be that girl. So the first time we started hanging out, I didn't want to be that girl that texts to soon, but two nights in a row of hanging out all night long I think I am allowed to text. I mean I hope so.. Well that is my story for now...I have a lot of life to go live now....yikes

....I dont only hate the way you look at me...I secretly love it

I am Sorority both literally and destined for such a life, not in the stereotypical way but in the way that I am meant to be apart of something bigger. I learned this over time and I know the nay sayers out there will be shaking their heads in disagreement, or even do that little snicker of haha every sorority girl says this... but you do not know unless you have been a true sorority girl. Any ways what I was getting at was in my last years of this sorority life interactions I have witnessed soooo many different types of hook-ups, so you would think I would be both a expert in them personally and how to give advice to those who do them. I find myself wondering what kinds of girls do some of the things I have heard, in regards to profiling. I mean I have acted a fool sometimes, who hasn't but I have and always will be acting in a way that no one could ever deem me as "that" girl. If you could put my name in a sentence with a negative phrase that has "that girl" in it, I don't want to be there.