Monday, April 16, 2012

Challenges help define you, but don't break you

What we have face us and how we overcome them, are true testaments to the type of person we are.


I was recently "seeing" a guy, I use the term seeing very loosely because we fell quickly before he left for a long distance gallivant.  I have a hard time writing this blog because I feel like the last ohhh 9 months were a bit of joke... it was like having a pen pal  you had known only for 3 months... instead of signing "write soon" we wrote "I love you"....which don't get me wrong I easily could say I didn't love him...but that wouldn't be true.....  I have written many blogs about love...  I know I wear my heart on my sleeve that is because I care for a lot of people far before they care for me.... Call me emotional, call me hopeless but you can't call me uncaring. I would rather wear my heart on my sleeve then not wear a heart at all. But now that, that is said...we can move on.... for the purpose of this blog I will call it a relationship..but don't think it was.... it was nothing of the sorts...  It was a good time, good stories, great friend.... he was there when I needed him most, some of the time....  he was the friend  I needed at the time I needed....  
There were things I regretted during that time, but that only taught me how to change my future since I can't change my past.  I guess you could say it was a mutual ending only because I wasn't willing to "wait"  around for him to figure out how awesome I am... I know I am awesome, but I don't need to wait around for someone to think and figure it out..... the person that is going to be worth my time will realize that from the get go and get to constantly experience it.... I sit and think about what a future could have been...  it all would have been a lie...a complete  180 from the life I lead now...  and I know I said I was willing...  and I would be, but I don't think I could have been for him...  because he wasn't giving as much as I was giving... and healthy relationships require give and take... So I guess I get to thank him for trying to over think  things that ended the relationship...  I am happier, which is hard because I was happy all along...  I have since met people that show me I can have the type of religious/cultural balance that I want, because I want, not because I have to.... The give and take is there...or has the potential to be there...either way it will be fair. 

Life is a ongoing lesson, Moral of this lesson:

Go with your gut---Your instincts, your family and friends usually are correct, no  matter how much you want to deny it.....
Listen to your heart ..&  mind....Don't put all of your heart into something your head isn't into
Love works the way it is suppose to...  sometimes you don't realize it right away
Tears are a waste... don't cry because in  the end... it just wasn't meant to be and you can't change that.

 This is what I want, what everyone should be allowed  to have 100%  of the time:


Happy Living & Hopefully Loving


1 comment:

  1. As one of your dearest friends...it is SOOO hard not to tell you "what to do", what is right for you or what is wrong for you, it's one of those things where people have to live it, experience it and like you said "learn from it". What would you have learned if I had told you how you "should have" approached this entire thing. As humans, we'd all love to avoid ugly situations, but hell, they make us who we are and we grow from it.

    As much as this whole situation sucked for you, love even more that you're a better, stronger, person for having gone through it :-)

    I love you with all my heart and you will find that greatest in a man that you deserve and in turn, there's a man out there that will find YOU, the woman that he deserves!

    I LOVE reading your blog, Twin!

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